Wife: You delivered an excellent speech.
Hubby: Thanks dear but the audience was full of fools and idiots.
Wife: Is that why you addressed them as your brothers and sisters
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Showing posts with label family jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family jokes. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
wife and husband
Friday, April 23, 2010
Husband and wife very funny
********************************
Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?
It means, Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
Wife: No darling, it means,
With Idiot For Ever
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper,
So I'd be in your hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper,
So I could have a new one everyday.
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping
Pills.
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.
Husband: You should have known it the minute
I asked you to marry me.
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it.
So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: Why Three?
Husband: For you and your parents
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?
Husband: A lovely Push...!!!
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******
Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?
A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again
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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband,
You know, I was a fool when I married you.
The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice
******************************
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Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Women are always women
A Woman was
out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into
the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to
her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed
to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times!" The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to". The woman replied,
"That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. " The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine." So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please scroll down.
The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who have a good sense of humour.
Bookmark this page
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times!" The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to". The woman replied,
"That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. " The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine." So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please scroll down.
The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who have a good sense of humour.
You may also like ........
Bookmark this page
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Awesome SMS jokes
Q. What do you
call a fat
lady waiting for a bus?
A.
Moti-vating!!!
Q. What is
the difference
between
WATCH
& WIFE?
A
. Ek
Bigadti
hai to
'BANDH ' ho jati
hai....Doosri Bigadti
hai to
'SHUROO' ho jati
hai
Q. Doctor : App
ka aur aapki biwi ka BLOOD
GROUP
ek hi hai.
A
.. Man :
Hoga, zarur hoga; 25 saal se mera khoon jo pee rahi hai.
Q. What's the
similarity
between
MOBILE
and MARRIAGE
?
A
. In both cases
you feel 'aur
thoda ruk jata to accha model milta'
Q. Ek admi ne
sadhu
se kaha
, meri biwi bahut
pareshan karti hai, koi upaaye
bataiye
A
. Sadhu bola ,
Upaaye hota to main sadhu kyoon
banta?
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